Act 1, the definition of libido: 1. Sexual desire. 2. The energy of the sexual drive as a component of the life instinct. So yes, Ladies, sex is a birth right!
Libido is important to our quality of life and part of our zest for life. It is such a powerful energy, some cultures cut it out, literally. My own took a beating for a year from a high place and fortunately returned. Once it was back and in full swing, I realized the vitality value of flexing my sexual muscles and its important role in a truly robust life.
Have you noticed a shift in yours? Do you know what lifts it? When it is vigorous, how do you feel? If you have decided that you are D. O. N. E. done, that’s fine. But please recall when your erotic energy was flowing and consider trying to revive it by deciphering the cause of it waning. We are in this together, so press on!
According to the American Sexual Health Association (ASHA) 1 in 3 women in the US experiences low sex drive (hypoactive sexual desire disorder). “Symptoms can include a decreased desire to have sex, fewer sexual thoughts and fantasies as well as sexual responsiveness”. Psychological, physical and environmental issues are to blame.
There are three major endocrine shifting female life events when libido takes a hit; postpartum, perimenopause and menopause. Hormone roller coaster rides can strip us of our sexy causing issues like weight gain, mood swings, insomnia, vaginal dryness (which leads to painful intercourse – dyspareunia and avoidance of sex) and simply feeling blah. Endometriosis, pelvic pain, poor body image or incontinence curb our kill our erotic appetite too. Fortunately, there is help with hormone replacement therapy (HRT) and vaginal therapy/treatments.
Caring for children or aging parents, financial difficulties, work stress or relationship issues can weigh heavily on sexual vivacity. Is your life running rough shod over you sapping you of time or energy to engage in passion play? Alcohol, tobacco, anti-depressants and other meds can also take a toll.
The brain is the largest sex organ of the body and feminine erotic energy is strongly tied to our heads and hearts. Our attitudes and interestingly those of our peers about sex, influence our sexual approach. What sensual and sexual permission do we give ourselves? Are church and state invited to your bedroom activities? Do you explore, experiment and ask for what you want? Communication is key.
Self-love can absolutely impact our quality of sexual satisfaction. A friend’s relationship recently collapsed because his fiancé couldn’t get around her own poor body image. He loved her body and soul, but her self-deprecation and insecurity ruined their sex life and their relationship. Do you think you are sexy and desirable? Or do self-deprecate? French and Italian women have mastered a positive outlook – they highlight and accentuate their best feature(s) and don’t give a second thought to the rest, so they ooze confidence and allure.
STDs and their physical manifestation combined with the unfortunate stigma attached, or personal trauma can rob us of our desire to be sexual too.
An interdependent blend of physical, emotional, environmental and mind set coalesce as to how we show up as our erotic selves. Humans are highly sexual creatures, engineered to attract, desire, give and receive pleasure. In many cases, we have the power to make it bloom or let it wilt and disappear.
Should we care? Extensive female interviews reveals the importance of sex drive in life greatly differs. It is a universal yet very personal thing. If yours is low and it is affecting quality of life, seek help. Managing low libido is something to be done with medical professionals; Ob-gyns, Urologists, Urogynecologists, menopause specialists, sex therapists or even religious counselors.
Please leave comments or questions below or contact us at [email protected] for more assistance. Tune in again for tools on igniting the passion back into your life.